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Same Shit…

Different Day

Here we are folks.. another Friday & I am beyond lonely. I have no one other than my four-year-old daughter and Grandfather to talk to… Obviously conversations are limited. I guess I could make due with my self absorbed emotionally unavailable mother or my schizophrenic “Baby Daddy” I hate that term BTW. And not to mention the ghosts. How could I forget get the spirits in my house. Don’t worry , I’ll fill yall in on those 3 hot topics. But another day. I can only write so much.

My daughter is sassy, inquisitive, funny as hell, exactly like me and a lil shit! My 80 something Grandfather, who I’ll refer to as GPJ, drives me equally insane. In full transparency, it’s not his fault. Back in 1982 the year of Our Lord he suffered a brain annyurism. I wasn’t born but it was a very traumatic experience for the whole. He was in a coma for a while and he woke up blind and with half a brain… but alive. His memory is shit. And its like I live in the real life version of “50 First Dates”. You laugh but I’m so serious. Other than being old, hes pretty fucking awesome but due to my fast talking ADHD he doesn’t understand any dang thing I say. More times than I’d like to admit he makes me want to induce a traumatic brain injury on my damn self SMH.

I loves these 2 human beings more than anything in the world but I crave something more than chit chats about the fabulous Harley Quinn who my daughter is obsessed with or how corrupt the US Military is. I have no friends. Not a one. I’m not weird or ugly. I am fat though , I’m not socially awkward. I guess I can’t muster up the balls to date or make friends. Healthy long Lasting relationships have never been my thing no matter how bad I want it to be. That’s all I can manage for tonight. Stay magical !

-Ashlee

2 replies on “Same Shit…”

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